See...Ummm...Wha Had Happened Was.....

OK….for the most part, this was a great week….my tummy has been doing  great , for going on the second week, so I’ve been able to eat and get my strength back….

I told you last week that Beatrice, Christine and I were in a planting mode…and got our herbs and tomatoes planted in cups…holes in the bottoms, sittin on plates and water in the plates…my daddy taught me well….and look at em grow….they are doing great…we all three treat them like they are our babies….you should see us out there admiring our work….then, just Thursday, we planted the watermelon, cantaloupe and zucchini straight into the ground….y.u.m.m.y….I just hope the altitude and cool nights don’t kill us there….time will tell, but the anticipation is awesome!!  We are still eating fresh beans from the garden everyday…just pick them, shell them and cook them….and the corn should be ready in the next 3-4 weeks!! I already have a list of more seeds I’m going to get when we are back home in August…food and flowers…oh, the yard and garden this Muzungu and her faithful side-kicks are going to have!!! I have included photos of our cups.....the first taken  just a couple of days after planting…the second, just yesterday….also, a picture of one of our “mounds” where we planted the other things….and looks like we are already getting watermelon sprouting….SCORE!!!

Also, this week, at the hotel…it was a fun week!! Our pastry chef quit a few weeks ago (he had to go back to Uganda to deal with Land Wranglers on his land there….it’s like the wild, wild, west, people), which left the assistant pastry chef as “the guy” in our bakery kitchen.  Xavier is his name…and one of the nicest guys you would ever want to meet. He has an infectious smile and an attitude like no-other. The guy is seriously HAPPY all the time!! I love that!! Anyway, as he told me, “I am a bread guy”…he loves to bake breads, make breads, come-up with new breads….now, in general….the Rwandan’s like their breads very dry…it’s why I don’t, for the most part, care for it…fresh out of the oven, it’s like it’s been sitting out for a day or two….I’m not complaining…it’s just another cultural difference. (The same is true of the meat they eat…VERY tough for the most part…and they like it that way). But, at Ishema, they have prided themselves in cakes and pastries as well, but Xavier isn’t really a “pastry guy”…..SO….I spent the better part of a couple of days with him, TRYING to help him learn the art of cake decoration….and this was a challenge on several levels. I say trying because, let’s face, it, I’m no expert myself….I can hold my own pretty well for family birthdays and such, but professional…I think not! First off…we have about three or four (there are a few more, but they are the really odd ones) cake decorating tips…and we only have the following colors of food coloring paste: Black, brown, green, blue (and just a titch of yellow). AND no bags to put the icing in…apparently they have been using rolled up paper bags….yeah…I have NO idea how to do THAT! The other thing they use here is icing sugar…talk about SWEET…holy cow…and it’s not powdered sugar…and instead of butter and milk, they use egg whites as a thinner and as their “moist” ingredient…so, let me put it this way…the consistency of their icing is SOOO not what I’m used to!! But…he seemed to have that part down, so all he really needed was help with the decoration part…I brought a few zip-lock bags that we had from when we sent stuff in our trunks, and we proceeded to try to decorate a cake….the first one was darling…(and no, no photo of it..didn’t have my camera that day), and I taught him the idea of using fresh flowers as decoration on a cake (for a woman or wedding)…WELL….he thought that was the greatest thing since sliced bread (no-pun intended)….next up…two birthday cakes for boys/men….remember our color choices….and can’t exactly use pink or yellow flowers on a cake for Innocent, the man….so we just did the best we could. I did let him do most of the work...with me just guiding him…and I tried to let him come up with the ideas of how to decorate...well….by the time we were done…he was BEAMING with pride at what he had accomplished! I did include photos of that…THAT’s the part of the job I love the most…teaching and encouraging. Am I  honest with them about ways to improve? …absolutely….but always in a positive way…I try never to be negative, as in beating them down in order to get them to do what they should be doing….that is fairly common here in Rwanda…that style of management, and not effective, in my opinion. My goal is to build them up, so they can gain the self confidence needed to become the best at what they do….It was a pleasure to spend that time in the bakery kitchen with Xavier. If nothing else, we had a ton of fun!! And this Muzungu taught Xavier the art of the“high five”.

An opportunity came up earlier in the week for Russell and I to head over to Kibuye (a town to the east of Kigali a couple of hours and right on the shores of Lake Kivu) to see the orphanage we didn’t get to visit a few weeks ago because I was so sick with my tummy, but also to meet and consult with a guy from Denver, who with some partners, are building an Eco-Lodge there as well. We were going to head down to Kigali on Saturday afternoon, over to Kibuye on Sunday, spend the night and back home by Monday evening. ….

But before we left on Saturday…it was a stunningly blue-bird weather day here…we decided to go for a little bike ride…ya know…get a little exercise and check out the area and road headed up to Volcanoes National Park. We’ve been doing that at least once a week…it’s a wonderful way to get the lay of the land. That road is also great for bike riding because there is very little motorized traffic…mostly people on foot, and from that road you can see all seven volcanoes surrounding Musanze. It is truly spectacular. Now before I go any further, I need to tell you that on most of the main roads around here, they have built into the roads (on both sides) these very deep, culvert like, concrete ditches to help with the water run-off during the rainy season. I have included a photo I took of Sabinyo  (which means jagged tooth), one of the seven volcanoes, and in that picture you can see what Russell has always referred to as the man-traps….the concrete ditches. Well…we’re riding along and I see another great photo op…an “oh, beautiful, wish you were here” picture (I included those photos as well), so I wait until I see a driveway into a not-yet- completed home…and the driveway, which is actually more like a walkway, also made of concrete, across the man-trap. So, I pull my bike in very carefully…take my pictures…and here’s when it gets interesting. Instead of pulling forward and turning around so that I could go back across the “bridge” forward, I decide to back up (hey, I’m ON the bridge, so I don’t have to back far)…and here’s where I made my mistake…I turned around to check and see if there were any cars or people coming and when I did, my back tire slipped sideways off the bridge, and the man-trap gobbled up me, and my bike on top of me. NOW, let me also say that while I, maybe, USED to be, I am no longer known for my cat-like reflexes and I can now confirm that I don’t bounce like I used to either!!  (and, YES, I was wearing a helmet) I knew instantly that I had hurt my ankle… badly…in fact, I thought it was broken…it swelled so badly, so quickly, and holy moly did it ever hurt. Russell was off his bike and helping me before I even stopped NOT bouncing, and immediately went into his EMT mode (yes, he is even an EMT, training he had to get when he was a NOLS instructor and out in the mountains for a minimum of 30 days at a time). Of course, we didn’t take my shoe off, and decided fairly quickly that getting me home and the ankle up and iced and the whole R.I.C.E. thing done was a priority…problem is…how? Well…the ride up is mostly an uphill grade, so down is, well, down…so  I coasted home…didn’t have to peddle two times the whole way…once we got my shoe off…yeah…let the major swelling begin…(and I also lost my signature, Strawberry Margarita, toe-nail polish on that foot so he could check my circulation) and after calling half the people we know here, who are in the medical profession, it was decided I would have to go to the hospital to get an x-ray… so Anna Reed came and got us with her car and took us over there, but she couldn’t stay because of a previous commitment , so I literally was wheeled into the x-ray room by Noel, the trusty x-ray tech (and he took a GREAT x-ray…it was crystal clear), and then he and Russell proceed to read the film (the dr. I need to see wasn’t there) and they decide it wasn’t broken…I’ve included photos of me with Noel (how do you like the shades) and then when I was waiting outside for Russell to pay (the x-ray costs us $14 USD),  and as you can see, I was the center of attention…everyone wanted to see the Muzungu lady with the ace bandages, and even more odd to them, ICE…and then…time to come home and no Anna Reed, so Russell wheeled me all the way home in the wheelchair…you think we get looks normally, just walking down the street, you should have seen the looks with us wheeling down the street. So yesterday, the Dr. made a house call…looked at the film and my ankle, and no it’s not broken, but the sprain is severe enough that today they put a cast on for a couple of weeks…but no fiberglass up here…only plaster, and no metal crutches, only wooden, so  the folks up at Shyira Hosptial were kind enough to send those things down to the hospital here in town,and over we traipse for such and I am now the proud owner of a black cast on right ankle…oh…the eye candy that is my leg!  I have to stay off my foot…with it propped up, for a while… and, again…with NO HGTV, (and my iPod decided to quit working yesterday), but that’s ok, too! It is what it is!!

 




 But…I brought pain meds with us from home for just these kinds of situations, and I’m doin ok…this really hasn’t freaked me out at all…ok...that may have something to do with the hydrocodone…I’m just sayin…no…really…accidents happen, although I have learned to NEVER, EVER, EVER back over a man-trap. Russell is taking good care of me, and our prayer is that once the cast comes off, I’ll be as good as new…ok…as good as old!! And hey, for what it’s worth…Noel told me I had GREAT bones “for someone my age”…THAT, people, was the silver lining of the day :) Y’all all have a great week….I think I’ll prop my foot up and stay a while!!

ME.......Speechless????

Well…what a HUGE difference a week makes. First off, let me say, I seriously didn’t mean to freak people out with the post last week, but when we started this journey, I promised I would be honest about what I was feeling…good or bad…week before last just happened to be REALLY bad!! BUT, after a “curl up in a fetal position and cry it out” day….I felt SOOO much better. The tummy continued to give me problems until a few days ago, but even that is going well now. I have been eating since Friday, albeit simple, bland foods, but so far, so good…I’m still taking it easy, but all and all, I have declared myself “well”!! And if anyone thinks I’m giving up THAT easily….you seriously don’t know ME very well!! I do though, want to thank ALL of you that emailed, facebooked or called to give me encouragement and to let me know you were praying for me….you have NO idea how much it helped….clearly, your prayers worked because I’m back people, I’m back  :)

When I look back today at what I was feeling a week ago, and why, I can now see God’s hand all over it. Do I think He intentionally made me sick….of course not, but do I think that’s what it took to get me to slow down long enough to evaluate how and what I was feeling…absolutely! And this is the thing…because I was home all day every day for almost three weeks, I have already started to develop strong relationships with Christine and Beatrice, the two women that work for us all day, every day! And while Beatrice (our gardener) doesn’t speak a lick of English…we have bonded over our shared love of planting and gardening. She, Christine and I spent a whole afternoon starting tomato (three different kinds), basil (two different kinds), oregano and Italian parsley seeds in plastic cups. Now…it wouldn’t have taken ME all afternoon, but the girls were SOOO curious about what I was doing….apparently they don’t start seeds in anything…except in the ground or they simply don’t grow it at all….and today, as we had the whole group for lunch again, we were giddy with excitement as we had our first sproutings!! SCORE!! And apparently, Beatrice, who has five children, told Christine that the reason I was so sick is because I was pregnant. Ummm…yeah…not so much!

Christine and I though, have had some deep conversations about just about everything from husbands to family to babies. She is the one that has filled me in on the reality of being an average woman in Rwanda today. That she can’t do ANYTHING without her husband’s permission. That she is not allowed to tell him NO… AT ALL! I wonder if that has anything to do why she is due to have her third baby at the end of July, when she had been told it would not be safe to have any more children (she and the baby are both great, thus far….THANK GOD). And I, in turn, have shared with her what it is like for me to be a wife to Russell., and a woman in a western country. We are building a deep friendship and it would have taken much longer for us to get there if I had not been sick and home every day! AND…she completely took me by surprise on Friday when she came to me and said, “I have something VERY important  to ask you”. Now, let me preface this by saying that naming a child is one of the most important, celebrated and honored things you can do in Rwanda. Also, the husband is the one who names the child….the wife having very little say. And after the baby is born, they have a HUGE naming ceremony and celebration. So…she says she has something VERY important to ask me and at that exact moment about 50 things go through my head…..she wants the day off tomorrow…she needs an advance on her salary…OH NO…she says to me, “I would like for YOU to name my baby.” ………………………………………………………………..that’s where I was SPEECHLESS!!! She said that the baby (it’s a girl, by the way) had to have a traditional Rwandan name, which her husband would choose, but she wanted ME to bless the baby with her second name (the one by which she will most likely be called). She also said that she had to gain the courage to TELL her husband that she would like for me to give the baby her second name, and then she says, “Praise God, he said OK”. Words really can’t even begin to describe how honored I feel  (not to mention the pressure of it all), but the name came to me almost immediately, it’s a name that goes back generations in my family and is also an important one in Russell’s as well, and it means “Oath to God”…..it is my sister’s name, our daughter’s middle name and our niece’s name…it is….ELIZABETH….when I told her today, she almost cried…she said it was PERFECT and that she knew I would honor her baby with a special name….*tears of joy flowing*  She also told me she would like for me to be in the delivery room with her (husbands don’t do THAT either, apparently). She is due on July 31, and we are due to leave on July 27th….my prayer is that a HEALTHY baby girl comes a few days early….So, I am no longer lonely….I had friendships all along…it just took me being sick to appreciate them!!

And lest we forget a Pete, the rooster, story this week….as you can see, I have included a picture of Pete, but to be fair and as to not be dishonest in any way, shape or form….when I went over to take the picture of Pete….just picture it….me traipsing around in the neighbor’s yard with  a high powered camera, on the hunt for Pete…and then I see him…but wait…then I see another, and another and another and another and….that’s right…. FIVE roosters….BUT…I knew Pete, when I saw him…I mean….look at the eyes…those are the eyes of a rooster who is bound and determined to end up on my dining room table…but as not to slight Pete’s friends, I gave them names as well….Matthew, Mark, Luke and John….I figured Pete could do with some heavenly influence…..and yes…he’s still at it ALL DAY, EVERY DAY!! I just don’t think Matthew, Mark, Luke or John would act that way…do you???

And I, of course, I couldn’t let this day pass without wishing a great big Happy Father’s Day to my husband, my dad and my father-in-law….these men have loved me and influenced my life in ways that are immeasurable. And while we weren’t able to be with them today, we hope they know how much we love and appreciate them! And while R squared wasn’t able to be with our kids today, as you can see from the pictures, he was surrounded by kids.....he was a HAPPY camper!!

Thanks again, to everyone, for all the prayers and continued support….I turned a corner this week…and I can honestly say I am “most settled”!!

Pete, the Pip....and Therapy, Too....

Well….another week down, and I have still been struggling with my tummy….finally, in the last 24 hours, I feel like I am actually turning a corner, but prior to that, I had a few crackers and two bowls of plain white rice, ALL LAST WEEK, which has left me physically and emotionally drained. Adjusting to life here is hard enough when you feel good and have good energy….when you don’t…it sure doesn’t make for an easy time.

Yesterday morning I pretty much hit a wall…I woke up crying and for the most part, cried a good chunk of the day.  I would get a grip and 10 minutes later, for no apparent reason, break into tears again. When Russell would ask me why…I had no real answer. Finally, last night, the urge to break into hysteria finally subsided. It was only then was I able to really analyze why I was feeling what I was feeling and actually verbalize it….not a simple answer, but a host of things that over the last 6 weeks had either gotten stuffed or shoved aside for all kinds of reasons. Some of them because of actual busyness, some of them from my own inability to address them for fear that I would look weak or vulnerable. I think getting sick and being physically weak helped push me over the edge, and it’s probably a good thing….being the achiever/persister I am, I would have continued to go on about it without dealing with the emotions that were clearly affecting my attitude about our life here.

 I guess the simplified answer is…I’m lonely. But it really is more than that. At home, I am an independent kinda girl…always have been…I’m the one who handles our finances (I ran Rainey Designs and run Christ in the Tetons, so it naturally spilled over to our personal finances), I’m the one who didn’t think TWICE about getting in my car and driving across county, either alone or with two small kids, if I wanted to head back to AR from WY. I’m the one that has friendships that run deep, VERY DEEP. My girlfriends and my family are a lifeline of sorts for me. Russell and I have never been the sort of married couple that had to be together all the time….we both cherish our times apart…making the times together all the better. Fast forward to here….where men definitely (although 56% of the Parliament is women) rule the roost. I am “Russell’s wife”….to try to go to the bank and get money without him, is difficult (not that I really need money, cause there’s not that much to even buy). We don’t have a car, so getting anywhere is also difficult, entailing walking or riding the bikes, or better yet, African buses. Running to the grocery store, isn’t a grocery store at all….getting some simple something from Wal-Mart…ummmm….not so much….no Wal-Mart’s or anything like it, and if there were, they wouldn’t have what I wanted or needed, and the language barrier is a constant issue. But more than all of that combined, I am without my core support system….my friends and family. Sure, we talk occasionally and Facebook each other, and instant message on Skype, but it’s surely not the same. Russell has been great, but he doesn’t, nor will he ever be able to, fill the hole in my heart that my girlfriends, my kids and my family fill. He simply can’t be my girlfriend, my daughter, my sister or my mom!

So, you ask…have you prayed about it…well, of course I have. I don’t know that, in this case, God has answered as much as He’s listened. And that’s ok. I don’t know that there was anything He could do…I think by just listening, He has allowed me to process through what has been a struggle for me most of my adult life…fear of failure. If I say outloud, “I’m  lonely”, is that failure? If I had pulled the plug on this whole thing yesterday (like I would have done had I been able to get in my car (which I don’t have) and get to an airport (except it’s 2 hours away), would that have been a failure? Two weeks ago, it would have been to me, today, I can honestly say, NO, it is not! Am I still lonely…..yes, I am…not even a good night’s sleep and settled down tummy can change that. Am I going to get on a plane today and pull the plug on this whole thing…No, I’m not. No one, especially God, promised this would be easy. I didn’t expect it to be….I didn’t expect it to be this soul searching either. I’ve said all along that being here would probably teach me a lot more than I am able to teach, and it hasn’t taken long to realize how true that statement is. I expect that as time goes on, with my new found ability to express what I am feeling without the fear that it is somehow a failure, it will enable me to build relationships here. To feel more independent, whether the men of this country like it or not….to be who I am rather that who I think the culture here thinks I should be. It’s all such a process…is it sometimes a painful one…absolutely. Will I survive it and end up stronger because of it…ABSOLUTELY!  “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” Phil 4:13

But as not to end this week on a completely sad sack note…didn’t know you would be part of a therapy session when you started reading today now did ya.…we have had some more “Life in Africa” moments….10 days ago, I walked into the kitchen at the hotel and was handling a crisis situation...you know, being my serious…let’s see how we can address this problem….self, and just about the time I hear the “bah, bah”…I see it as well…the goat…yes a GOAT…tied up in the kitchen. I was thinking….am I delusional…high blood pressure maybe…seeing things…NOOOO…it was a real, live goat. My first reaction…have to be honest here…was “WHAT THE H#& IS THERE A GOAT DOING TIED UP IN THIS KITCHEN”, which I said out loud, but no one understood me because no one speaks a lick of English, save one guy, who said to me in his broken English “lunch tomorrow”….now, from the quizzical look on my face, he could tell it wasn’t quite registering, so he very simply raised his hand to his throat and made the left to right motion….to which I gasp, and then the whole staff laughed at my horror of the whole thing.  I said “Get that goat out of this kitchen and I don’t want to ever, EVER see another animal tied up in here again” How many code violations do you think were violated….IF we had inspectors, I’m thinking quite a few.

And then yesterday, of all days, Pete, the rooster, became a back-up singer….or as I now call him, Pete, the PIP…as in Gladys Knight and the PIPS…minds out of the gutter people, minds out of the gutter. Although, the way the chickens are always in an uproar over there…..I’m just sayin.  So, you know, the Church (St. John the Baptist) is not 25 yards away. Well yesterday, the choir practiced ALL DAY…and when I say all day….I mean like 7 AM -5PM….and their repertoire is about 10 English, contemporary Christian songs. So they go after it, singing the same songs over and over, with the keyboard set on a beat like a rockin pop song, and after each song ended, the microphone would squeal…and every time they would hit a high note or the mic would squeal, Pete, the Pip, would crow with everything he had…as if on cue.  So, we dubbed it KSJB (as in a radio station that plays the same songs in a rotation) and live in the studio, Pete, the Pip. You’ve gotta love how much these precious people love the Lord and want to always praise Him, but I think they should carefully consider bringing Pete, the Pip, in to sing back up on a regular basis….it might just save him from my dining room table!

A New Neighbor.....Named Pete

Sorry I’m a little late with my post this week…..and I’m afraid this one will be shorter than usual….my tummy is again in a tailspin and frankly, I’m still not feeling great. They say this can happen over here…ya know…your body getting used to all the new bugs and such, but really, enough already!

I can say, with relief, that the marching band is gone, although we are still listening to the cadets doing drills, and we have a new friend in the neighborhood…just next door….Pete, the rooster. We named him Pete because he reminds us of our little friend, Pete Greenwood…..he goes NON-STOP….all the time!! I mean Pete, the rooster, NEVER, EVER stops crowing….EVER! And every now and then you hear the chickens all in an uproar…and I’m thinkin…Pete is after him some ladies….bow chicka bow wow!! Maybe that’s why he’s crowing all the time…I’m not sure, all I know is, if Pete doesn’t chill soon…he may be what’s for dinner!!

We also had friends from Little Rock here for the last week, Chris Pledger and Douglas Braswell, and it has been GREAT to see familiar faces and have fun with them. Unfortunately, I am missing out on some of the fun this week because of my tummy, but I’m hoping this isn’t the last time they visit, and I’m hoping next time they bring their wives! We are also thankful for them hauling more trunks over for us filled with all kinds of things we think we can’t live without…ok…tools and such, but a few goodies thrown in thanks to a plethora of folks who added things here and there! It’s amazing how excited one gets about fly swatters and ant motels (oh and the m & m’s and garlic salt as well)

On Saturday, we did get to go visit Ronald’s sisters up at the Sonrise School...visiting day for family and friends. If you don’t know that story, you need to read Russell’s latest blog at www.musanzeinc.com, which will explain all about Ronald and his family. I have included some pictures of the girls, Patience, is 14 now, and Gloria is 5. Gloria is still very detached, but she did finally warm up enough to let me take her picture. After our visit to Sonrise, we headed up to the Virunga Mountain Lodge, overlooking Lake Barrera. It’s a stunning setting, and as it happened, Don Cheadle, the actor of Hotel Rwanda fame, was staying there after speaking at the baby gorilla naming ceremony earlier in the day.  He didn’t really interact with us non-celebrity sorts other than giving me a titch of chess advice as he walked by Douglas and I playing…but it was a wonderful night with wonderful friends!

I’m hoping this bug, or whatever it is, leaves my tummy alone soon….as I am fond of saying…it’s about on my very LAST nerve. The only advantage at this point is the poundage that seems to be dropping off my body daily….I can assure you, I would rather be “fluffy”!

If you think about it, I would appreciate a prayer….thanks and God Bless!!